Chasing sheep with a small orchestra #narrowboat #England

Ever wondered what happens when one’s orchestra chases sheep along a canal towpath? Well, wonder no longer.

Last evening’s high winds of 40-50mph obviously had an emotional effect on these sheepsies, moving them to, well …move. My first discovery on this morning’s perambulations was that I still had my slippers on. My second discovery, on going back aboard to change into some shoes, was that I had forgotten to dress. Back aboard, third time lucky and I set off on the usual route – and that was when I discovered these beauties, all trying to get through the gate at the Cholmondesley lock and onto “Insanity Lane”.

Well, as many of you, the Society of Genealogists, and Inspector Crotchfiddler of the National Perpetual Offender’s Unit will already know, I am three-quarters Welsh Collie – so naturally, my first and only instinct was to round them up.

Mind you, I do think that perhaps I shouldn’t have pretended to ride a hobby-horse and shouted “yes indeed, my lovelies” at them. Even the sheepsies were a little contemptuous of that. Dropping to all fours, running around and barking at them was probably a mistake too. They all showed me their opinion of my technique in the customary manner.

I do have to say though, folk oftentimes criticise English farmers, but these were the easiest, most bestest-haved sheep that I have ever had the pleasure to round up.

The ladies all went back around the bend (as do we all at some point in our lives), up the bank and back into their field. They are milling about there now to await fattening and then a final visit to the whirling blades of the abattoir and, plop – onto the plates of you omnivors. Mint sauce, roast potatoes and cabbage if you’re local, or probably “French fries” and mayonnaise if you’re foreign, or otherwise trapped on the wrong side of the channel.

It is so very sad that so many of you are trapped abroad. I do think of you every day, and hope that life isn’t too terrible for you all. Are any of you in countries that have the bucolic? We used to be able to send a lot of the bucolic abroad, but of course we’re not allowed to now that the The Empire has been “discontinued due to lack of local co-operation”. Still, chin up, chaps, I’m sure that it’s just lovely where you live too and, if it isn’t, well – hah-hah!

The rest of the day’s stroll was quite uneventful really. A footpad here, a challenging cove there (both dispatched with the aid of my trusty sword-stick, a present from my dear late Mother on the occasion of my tenth birthday). Much sunshine (gone now – back to eight-eights cloud cover) and much fresh air was had by all. Most splendid, most splendid indeed.

Back now to the Cardinal for, methinks, a reward of a nice, hot, vegetable curry with rice and perhaps a bottle of beer.

Baaaa.

IGH. Qualified Sheepherd as well as Boatist, available at reasonable rates throughout the lambing season (after which unreasonable rates apply).